I realize that many of you; perhaps most of you, are so well grounded and so mentally healthy that the idea of any sort of additional emotional support might seem strange; even laughable. But some of us are not so fortunate. We have various phobias or anxieties that can interfere when things get rough. Or just make things worse.
A couple of decades ago I had a serious medical event and ended up in the emergency department of a local hospital. Then spent a week in intensive care. But on my way to the hospital I grabbed for my "security blanket." My old, crusty, Leica M3 and its 50mm Summicron lens. I kept it with me during my entire stay. It was a comforting companion.
Back then I had a needle phobia. Stick me with an IV needle or even jab me with a simple injection and chances are I would immediately be in danger of hitting the floor and passing out. Either that or projectile vomiting. But somehow, with my camera in my hands I could make it through all the puncturing and injecting without falling completely apart.
I can't remember taking any photographs during my stay. If I did they have not surfaced and most likely didn't survive. And since my hair was a mess I'm glad I don't have to violate my own privacy and show selfies from that time. But I'm also glad that I kept my camera close and by focusing on it reduced my fears and trepidations about medical procedures. And the specter of a possible, untimely demise.
Having something besides whatever catastrophe is unfolding in your life, that's out of your control, gives you an external thing upon which to focus. The distraction is a great thing. And the memory of your past time with the object of your distraction also brings back good feelings. Also medicinal.
But, of course, most of you are immune to the foibles of being only human. And so maybe an Emotional Support Camera is unnecessary for you. That's nice.
Me? I still keep an ESC handy. You never know when you might need a good diversion from something less than fun. While my ESC at the time was a Leica I think any camera which you've used a lot and like a lot works well. I might have done equally well with the old Canonet QL17. But keep your ESC small enough to handle with one hand. Just in case the other hand is immobilized by an IV. Experience...
Sure. A Leica for a psychological support prop is expensive. But I'd rather have a prescription for a nice camera than for a bottle of Xanax.
Hope you have a fun and carefree Thanksgiving. Watch out for those "top ten" lists. They are sure to hit soon.
13 comments:
I can fully relate to that.
You might enjoy an old film titled "Passion Fish" where one of the characters takes up photography at a difficult time in her life. It also contains a very sensitive and subtle performance by David Strathairn. It's a quiet low-key film that at first appears to be going nowhere.
Thanks for sharing that Kirk. It takes guts to open up about past trauma. Especially for us men. I've had severe PTSD for around 40 years. Fortunately meds help and some therapy. It's a day by day thing and going for walks with my camera(s) is one thing that really works for me. Being in nature for me is the most healing thing.
Eric
photography as therapy and the physical object of a fav camera as therapy too. totally understand that! same for me as well! swimming is also the same for you! your swimming is my cross country skiing in the winter and bicycling year around.
I personally might get more value out of an Emotional Support Totoro. Whether this qualifies as "better adjusted" or something else, I couldn't say.
Jeff in Colorado
Wonderful post, Kirk. We've all gone through something like this. I wonder if you can get a red sticker saying "support camera" to attach, allowing you to photograph in the hospital.
I once worked for a theme park and had to go up in a helicopter to take photos of a new ride. My dislike of flying and fear of heights kicked into high gear when I realized the way you shoot from a helicopter is with the doors off. I overcame my terror by looking through the camera's viewfinder the whole time we were in the air, telling myself I was just watching television and I should relax and enjoy the program! I got the photos but had the pilot land when I needed to change lenses and film.
Kirk, you're certainly not alone. There is a world famous self-portrait of Helmut Newton during his stay at the Lenox Hill Hospital, NYC in 1973.
Kirk, Pardon my ignorance but what does "ESC" imply in the context of this post? (My mind is thinking it is something similar to "EDC", Everyday Carry.)
Of course. I sure missed the corner and went out into the weeds.
NHNF.....(no harm, no foul).
I have my eye on a monochrom Leica. Just need to give health insurance a call for that $10 copay.
So…if I can get a prescription…it becomes a medical expense…and I can write it off…and of course it only works for my particular condition if it’s a rangefinder camera….That said, the ICU is a depersonalizing space, bereft of any real reassuring visual or auditory cues. Something familiar, that I can hold in my hand, somehow allows me to remain connected to the world outside that space and the thoughts and fears in my own head.
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